What do you do when you fail?

Have you ever looked into your reactions when things happen. More specifically have you ever noticed how you react when you fail at something?

Your reactions tell a lot about you. They tell a lot about your character and how you hold yourself under adversity.

Obviously there are a myriad of different ways you could react towards a situation. However, when you boil them all down. You really come out with only two ways someone can react towards something.

Fight or Flight.

I am sure you've heard of this before.

This type of response comes from your amygdala, or what others like to call your "croc" brain. That's the part of your brain that controls the emotions that you go through. So when you are faced with adversity, or with a sudden experience that you haven't been able to collect enough mental patterns on to create a habit.

Your amygdala takes over. This is the first sign we get to see about your character.

Now you may not be able to control your emotional state right away, but you can work now to create patterns to help your unconscious mind make better decisions for you.

For example. You might never know the fear of having a gun shoved in your face, and the person holding it screaming at you, saying "you're going to die." ( I pray you never have to know that fear.)

If it would happen. How would you react? Would you faint? would you cry? would you wet your pants? would you shout obscenities' at the person? would you try to wrestle away the gun?

You could sit here and think about the ways you might react. Never really knowing if you would or not.


You could practice your react and the following events to make them a habit.

See when that spur of the moment event happens. Your emotional state will be off the charts. At that point your instincts (croc-brain) will take over, and whatever it is programmed with (fight or flight), that is the actions it will take.

So even though you won't be consciously acting, your sub-conscious will be, and you can create habits and programming for that to go a certain way.

The same thing can happen when you fail. You can program yourself now to act a certain way when that happens. Not that you ever "plan" to fail, but you can create habits to serve you better for the times you do, unexpectedly. Let's face it. None of us are perfect so failing is something we will do until the day that we die. Get used to it, make it work for you.

You might be reading this and thinking it's all a bunch of b.s., and that is fine. I am just here to give you tools to help make your life better.

But next time something doesn't go the way you wanted it to. Don't just let your reaction and your emotions pass you by. Stop and think about how you are reacting and why.

If you are reacting negatively and don't like that. You might want to think about that, and think about changing that reaction to something that better serves you and your future.

Jonathan Scharinger